Poor Financial Lessons Parents Are Inadvertently Teaching Their Kids
Parents are often referred to as the first teachers in their child’s life. It is the responsibility of parents and supporting family members to provide a solid foundation from which their children can learn to live life. While most families try the best they can to teach their children the properly, sometimes they inadvertently pass on poor habits and traits that follow their children right through adulthood. One area in which parents unknowingly teach poor habits is personal finance.
When it comes to personal finances, many adults are unaware of how to handle them properly. It is not until something goes terribly wrong that the need to learn on how to effectively manage personal finances come into place, however, by this point your children have already absorbed a great deal of what your actions have shown. Below are a few lessons you may be unconsciously teaching your children about finances.
1. Debt is the Solution
While parents don’t need to share every aspect of their personal finances with their children, failure to talk to them about the importance of staying out of debt leads to the conclusion that debt is the solution. Parents constantly paying for things with credit cards or taking out financial loans at every turn leads children to believe that in order to get ahead in life, borrowing funds is the solution. While borrowing funds and being in some debt is common, it is not the ideal go to solution. Though you may have talked with your teen about the importance of good credit and low debt, they only SEE you using debt.
2. Spend Now Saving is Optional
Did you know that approximately 62% of Americans do not have a emergency savings account? Many adults do not effectively save money for rainy days or even for planned events such as retirement. While you may have told your kids about saving money, your actions are what they’re paying attention to. Many adults don’t think about saving until something has gone wrong to cause their finances to be disrupted. Children who are watching essentially believe that there is always time to save money later. In essence they develop a, “We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it” attitude.
3. Being Rich Will Solve All Your Problems
There is nothing wrong with wanting to be financial well off, but if you’re completely honest you know that more money does not erase all of your problems. When your children constantly hear you saying things like, “when I get this promotion things will be better”, “when I hit the mega million I can solve this matter”, “If my job paid me more maybe I wouldn’t be behind on my bills, they begin to believe that having an abundance of money will erase any problem they have.
4. Money Problems Destroy Relationships
Couples that don’t know how to effectively communicate and resolve money matters amicably end up lashing out without even knowing it. Married couples getting divorced, mom and dad not speaking to each other, and even arguments every time there’s money involved sends the message that money can destroy relationships. This in turn can teach children that its better to withhold issues with money from their significant others to prevent the drama. OR it can show children that arguing about money matters is the way to resolve the matter. Either way, this is a negative message to send.
5. Telling Little Fibs About Money is Alright
How many times have you answered a phone call from a creditor and made up an excuse as to why you couldn’t pay? Was that excuse the truth? Many parents tell small lies with the hopes of wiggling their way out of a bad situation. “Oh I recently got fired from my job, I need more time”, “I’m barely surviving financially, I’ll call you next week to set something up.” However, the reality is that you simply didn’t manage your money well. Your kids catch on to this and believe that lying is the answer for dealing with money issues that they don’t know how to resolve.
6. Being Competitive with Money is Cool
Last, but certainly not least, parents give off the impression that it is okay to compete when you have money. Bragging about having the bigger house or the best car, and keeping up with the Joneses are common examples of how parents give off this impression. While competition is necessary in certain areas of life, you don’t want your children to believe that the only way to be successful is to have money and buy nice things. They in turn feel like they have to keep up with the competition causing them to create the illusion that they’re more successful than they really are.
Don’t Let Finances and Wealth Get the Best of You
Wanting to succeed in life and managing your finances can often cause a great deal of stress. Essentially when we allow certain areas of our life to get out of control, it can begin to have psychological and eventually physical affects on our health and well-being. If you’ve begun to notice changes in your mental or physical well-being such as elevated levels of stress, periods of sadness, or disconnections from your daily activities it’s time to rethink the way your finances run your life.
The fact is, that personal finances and wealth management are important aspects of life. If you fail to handle your finances properly essentially you create a lot of unnecessary stress and debt. While you are well aware of this and strive to teach your children the importance of managing their finances effectively, your actions speak louder than your words. Be mindful of how you handle money matters in front of your children. While you don’t have to disclose every bit of your financial status to them, it is important that you try your best to emulate the very lessons you are trying to teach them.
